Competitions
Laughing Matters 2017 saw online competitions being held for creative writing, photography and art, in the field of humour.
The creative writing competition, titled 'Writ in Wit' had its participants writing on one of three prompts, which included a picture prompt, 'Nonsense Sounds' and 'The Last Laugh'. Tript Kaur from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
The photography competition, titled 'Twisted' witnessed submissions on the eponymous theme. Swastika Jajoo from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
The theme of the art competition, 'Laughter Lines' was 'The Punchline'. This theme could be interpreted in the form of paintings, digital art, comics, caricatures and cartoons. Tvesha Singh from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
Here are the winning entries.
The creative writing competition, titled 'Writ in Wit' had its participants writing on one of three prompts, which included a picture prompt, 'Nonsense Sounds' and 'The Last Laugh'. Tript Kaur from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
The photography competition, titled 'Twisted' witnessed submissions on the eponymous theme. Swastika Jajoo from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
The theme of the art competition, 'Laughter Lines' was 'The Punchline'. This theme could be interpreted in the form of paintings, digital art, comics, caricatures and cartoons. Tvesha Singh from English (Hons), Lady Shri Ram College won the event.
Here are the winning entries.
Writ in Wit
Prompt Chosen: The Last Laugh
BUNGLE IN THE JUNGLE
(A tale of Panchatantra in present day India)
BUNGLE IN THE JUNGLE
(A tale of Panchatantra in present day India)
The high profile case of cutting the People Tree spread like wildfire in the imaginary forests of India. The prosecution claimed that it had an airtight case while the defence attorney refused to comment when pestered by mulish media persons. So much so that Prime Minister Lion, who at that time was signing a treaty with Greenland’s head of cave manufacturing to Make in India, cut his trip short.
Judge Monkey adjusted his wig and spread his oversized gown over a pile of banana refreshment. He threw a peel at the blindfolded Parrot Lady of Justice who somehow balanced on her scales despite the biodegradable assault. Since the Eagle of Freedom was sick with pesticide poisoning, the dual charges of justice and liberty were painted on a signboard that hung on her subsidised cage.
The monkey banged his gavel, calling for disorder. “Let the accused in,” he said.
Viper slipped into her seat. She hissed sadly, causing the sparrows to shrink in their places.
“Dudes, weren’t you extinct?” Typewriter Hare curiously asked.
“This isn’t Delhi, dumbass,” a particularly precocious sparrow twittered.
Prosecutor Penguin and Bear, the defence attorney bowed in front of the judge while the last whispers of the audience quieted down into expectant silence.
Penguin began, “The facts of this case are that on the midnight of 15th August 2047, the People Tree faced its tryst with destiny. Cut in half, its body breathed its last. The cat which rested on it every day either crashed to its death or disappeared under suspicious circumstances, according to the guards who reached the scene of the crime first, as no body was found. A few drops of blood spilled on the ground prove this observation. Due to unclear video recording, the security personnel were unable to identify the culprit. However, one of the officials claimed to have heard a slithering sound. Technicians and professor-robots of ancient science affirm that the sound was akin to that made by a snake. This Viper was found in the vicinity of the crime scene.
I’ll now like to call my first witness, Peacock.”
The haughty bird preened its brightly coloured feathers, blinding half the audience’s aesthetic appreciation for black and white (the other half had already dozed off). Newly escaped from third grade SST textbooks, it glared at the stubborn sky and wished for unacidic rain, before stepping into the witness stand. When handed a Bhagwad Gita to swear on, it confessed that it was not a Hindu.
Cue collective silence.
Reporter Deer dropped a pin to check. Supported by Salman Khan’s gracious assistance in terms of (a) killing his annoying cousin and (b) the ensuing media coverage, he had catapulted himself to ‘Reporter for Animal Rights’ status. His kind still holds a genetically wired fear of beefy film stars who have stupid dance moves.
Anyway, Peacock’s blasphemy notwithstanding, the prosecutor asked,
“Where were you on the midnight of 15th August 2047?”
“Manning the security cameras, when I heard this slytherin moving away.”
“No further questions,” Penguin said tiredly. As the audience leapt into the fury of discussion, Penguin cursed the bloody Indian heat, almost tore apart his skin-suit, and fantasized about his mom’s description of Antarctica. The block of ice that his family was shooting a movie on, occupied his thoughts.
Bear, the defence attorney who had been bearing an exhausting week in the zoo enclosure fighting with his errant brother, heard the cacophony, looked at proud Peacock and defeated Viper, and left to hibernate. Viper miserably wriggled until Judge Monkey finally paid attention.
“What do you want to do now?”
“Pisssssssssssssssssssssssssssss,” she replied.
Before the judge could respond, in came a group of wolf police officers. They started baying at Penguin.
“Shut up guys. I’m not the moon,” Penguin’s features contorted with pain.
“We’re the werewolf battalion. Here for some bird who blasfed. Swan, or Bella, or something. (Insert writer’s apology: Couldn’t resist) Which one is he?”
Deer pointed at the cocky bird and chuckled to himself as Peacock’s cuffed tail struggled against the burly werewolves. Peacock screeched out PETA warnings against them for wearing fur. The poor snake’s plight forgotten, the prosecutor called in the second witness. When Cheetah took his oath, his saffron spots suddenly turned green. He fled from the scene before the moral police could follow in khaki shorts and end his run in a fake encounter.
Unperturbed, the prosecutor called in the third witness, Tiger. Despite being endangered by demonetisation, he climbed the witness stand for the sake of justice. Before Penguin could begin, Tiger announced,
“I don’t burn bright any more
Please don’t spell me with a ‘y’
My fearful symmetry is sad and dull
Question me before I die.”
Deer carefully recorded the emotional verse and played it on loop on Prime Time news. It brought in record TRPs.
“Where were you on the midnight of 15th August 2047?” Penguin asked, irritably adjusting his collar.
“I had gone there to pay obeisance to the tree. I used to go there every evening to meditate. When I went there a little later than usual, at around 11:45 pm, I thought I saw something rush past me very fast. I wasn’t able to see it clearly.”
“Was it a mammal or a reptile?”
“I couldn’t see it clearly. I have weak eyesight. Hyenas help me hunt nowadays.”
“This doesn’t prove anything!” Viper desperately shouted.
Her voice was lost in the din of a posse of rats in chef coats who entered without permission. They were friends with the higher ups. They left after shooting a few scenes for the ‘Ratatouille’s Sons’ TV series.
“Okay, where was I?” Viper continued.
Tiger had succumbed to a heart attack by then.Judge Monkey had finished all his bananas. It made no sense to continue. He decided to postpone the hearing to a later date. Typewriter Hare rudely interrupted him,
“This goes on and on and on, kill me someone. For God’s sake I did it! I was tired of the tortoise and decided to chop up the damn tree instead of running further laps. Give me a bloody sentence, someone.” Judge Monkey answered his plea.
“I want carrots in my cell, ya hear?” Hare seemed to be thanking God for ending his misery.
Viper was finally allowed to visit the washroom. Deer didn’t have to buy the ‘Reporter of the Year’ award, this time. Judge went on a trip to Banana Bahamas. Penguin never returned to Antarctica as his ancestral block had melted by then. Oh and I forgot, the cat who had supposedly crashed to death when the tree was cut, turned out to be Puss in Boots. He had already leapt onto another tree after slashing Hare’s leg (needed an explanation for the blood).
Hare was given a life sentence which was reduced to 2 years. He was given bail before he completed his sentence.
And they lived happily ever after.
I’m missing something...
Oh yes!
The tortoise won the race when Hare was in jail. It had the last laugh.
Moral of the Story- Someone free Parrot Lady. Eagle is back.
Tript Kaur
Judge Monkey adjusted his wig and spread his oversized gown over a pile of banana refreshment. He threw a peel at the blindfolded Parrot Lady of Justice who somehow balanced on her scales despite the biodegradable assault. Since the Eagle of Freedom was sick with pesticide poisoning, the dual charges of justice and liberty were painted on a signboard that hung on her subsidised cage.
The monkey banged his gavel, calling for disorder. “Let the accused in,” he said.
Viper slipped into her seat. She hissed sadly, causing the sparrows to shrink in their places.
“Dudes, weren’t you extinct?” Typewriter Hare curiously asked.
“This isn’t Delhi, dumbass,” a particularly precocious sparrow twittered.
Prosecutor Penguin and Bear, the defence attorney bowed in front of the judge while the last whispers of the audience quieted down into expectant silence.
Penguin began, “The facts of this case are that on the midnight of 15th August 2047, the People Tree faced its tryst with destiny. Cut in half, its body breathed its last. The cat which rested on it every day either crashed to its death or disappeared under suspicious circumstances, according to the guards who reached the scene of the crime first, as no body was found. A few drops of blood spilled on the ground prove this observation. Due to unclear video recording, the security personnel were unable to identify the culprit. However, one of the officials claimed to have heard a slithering sound. Technicians and professor-robots of ancient science affirm that the sound was akin to that made by a snake. This Viper was found in the vicinity of the crime scene.
I’ll now like to call my first witness, Peacock.”
The haughty bird preened its brightly coloured feathers, blinding half the audience’s aesthetic appreciation for black and white (the other half had already dozed off). Newly escaped from third grade SST textbooks, it glared at the stubborn sky and wished for unacidic rain, before stepping into the witness stand. When handed a Bhagwad Gita to swear on, it confessed that it was not a Hindu.
Cue collective silence.
Reporter Deer dropped a pin to check. Supported by Salman Khan’s gracious assistance in terms of (a) killing his annoying cousin and (b) the ensuing media coverage, he had catapulted himself to ‘Reporter for Animal Rights’ status. His kind still holds a genetically wired fear of beefy film stars who have stupid dance moves.
Anyway, Peacock’s blasphemy notwithstanding, the prosecutor asked,
“Where were you on the midnight of 15th August 2047?”
“Manning the security cameras, when I heard this slytherin moving away.”
“No further questions,” Penguin said tiredly. As the audience leapt into the fury of discussion, Penguin cursed the bloody Indian heat, almost tore apart his skin-suit, and fantasized about his mom’s description of Antarctica. The block of ice that his family was shooting a movie on, occupied his thoughts.
Bear, the defence attorney who had been bearing an exhausting week in the zoo enclosure fighting with his errant brother, heard the cacophony, looked at proud Peacock and defeated Viper, and left to hibernate. Viper miserably wriggled until Judge Monkey finally paid attention.
“What do you want to do now?”
“Pisssssssssssssssssssssssssssss,” she replied.
Before the judge could respond, in came a group of wolf police officers. They started baying at Penguin.
“Shut up guys. I’m not the moon,” Penguin’s features contorted with pain.
“We’re the werewolf battalion. Here for some bird who blasfed. Swan, or Bella, or something. (Insert writer’s apology: Couldn’t resist) Which one is he?”
Deer pointed at the cocky bird and chuckled to himself as Peacock’s cuffed tail struggled against the burly werewolves. Peacock screeched out PETA warnings against them for wearing fur. The poor snake’s plight forgotten, the prosecutor called in the second witness. When Cheetah took his oath, his saffron spots suddenly turned green. He fled from the scene before the moral police could follow in khaki shorts and end his run in a fake encounter.
Unperturbed, the prosecutor called in the third witness, Tiger. Despite being endangered by demonetisation, he climbed the witness stand for the sake of justice. Before Penguin could begin, Tiger announced,
“I don’t burn bright any more
Please don’t spell me with a ‘y’
My fearful symmetry is sad and dull
Question me before I die.”
Deer carefully recorded the emotional verse and played it on loop on Prime Time news. It brought in record TRPs.
“Where were you on the midnight of 15th August 2047?” Penguin asked, irritably adjusting his collar.
“I had gone there to pay obeisance to the tree. I used to go there every evening to meditate. When I went there a little later than usual, at around 11:45 pm, I thought I saw something rush past me very fast. I wasn’t able to see it clearly.”
“Was it a mammal or a reptile?”
“I couldn’t see it clearly. I have weak eyesight. Hyenas help me hunt nowadays.”
“This doesn’t prove anything!” Viper desperately shouted.
Her voice was lost in the din of a posse of rats in chef coats who entered without permission. They were friends with the higher ups. They left after shooting a few scenes for the ‘Ratatouille’s Sons’ TV series.
“Okay, where was I?” Viper continued.
Tiger had succumbed to a heart attack by then.Judge Monkey had finished all his bananas. It made no sense to continue. He decided to postpone the hearing to a later date. Typewriter Hare rudely interrupted him,
“This goes on and on and on, kill me someone. For God’s sake I did it! I was tired of the tortoise and decided to chop up the damn tree instead of running further laps. Give me a bloody sentence, someone.” Judge Monkey answered his plea.
“I want carrots in my cell, ya hear?” Hare seemed to be thanking God for ending his misery.
Viper was finally allowed to visit the washroom. Deer didn’t have to buy the ‘Reporter of the Year’ award, this time. Judge went on a trip to Banana Bahamas. Penguin never returned to Antarctica as his ancestral block had melted by then. Oh and I forgot, the cat who had supposedly crashed to death when the tree was cut, turned out to be Puss in Boots. He had already leapt onto another tree after slashing Hare’s leg (needed an explanation for the blood).
Hare was given a life sentence which was reduced to 2 years. He was given bail before he completed his sentence.
And they lived happily ever after.
I’m missing something...
Oh yes!
The tortoise won the race when Hare was in jail. It had the last laugh.
Moral of the Story- Someone free Parrot Lady. Eagle is back.
Tript Kaur